2002-09-11 - 7:55 p.m.
..dancing all the way to the pirate's ball i decided to stop in on my friend louis who has always given me the best pieces of glass known to elephants. i knew that if he had seen the particular watch that i was wearing that day, he would have promptly phoned his sister and had her deported, so i quickly hid it underneath my shoe.
as i walked into louis', i passed bertha who was perched on the rock inside the foyer. she quickly took off her veil and showed me the copper recently installed into her pupils...a tad gruesome, but, fetching nonetheless. she told me that louis was in his study. i made my way to the outhouse in the parlor.
when i found louis, he had obviously been dead for months. a small tape recorder wrapped in silk lay inside his mouth, constantly playing the words "hello" and "ok", thus fooling anyone who came into contact with him. but how had he fooled bertha, with whom he made love to every evening? it was then that i remembered that bertha was completely deaf. ever since that terrible porcupine accident back in '70, she hadn't even been able to hear the cannons on sunday.
i put the tape recorder back into louis' mouth, closed his lips, shined his shoes, slapped him on the back, and said "good job old boy, foolin' that deaf girly."
i wrote goodbye on the wall beside bertha, and quickly left for the ball.
